Thursday, May 10, 2007

Am I White Trash?

25 signs that you just might be. These jokes were stolen fair and square from Jeff Foxworthy and them other rednecks with the blue collars...

AND I JUST BORROWED IT FROM MY COUSIN LYNDER LOU and no that ain't her picture at the bottom.

1. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.
2. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.
5. Jack Daniel's makes your list of most admired people.
6. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
7. Anyone in your family has died right after saying,"Hey yall watch this!"
8. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
9. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.
10. Your junior prom had a daycare.
11. You think the last words of the Star Spangled Banner are, "Gentlemen, start your engines." 12. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded off its wheels.
13. The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas is in it.
14. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.
15. One of your kids was born on a pool table.
16. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
17. You can't get married to your sweetheart cause there's a law against it.
18. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
19. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
20. Somebody says, "Hoe Down" and your girlfriend hits the floor.
21. You have a complete set of salad bowls & they all say Cool Whip on the side.
22. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.
23. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
24. Your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop brings you home every night.
25. You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.

For Information on Catering and Private Parties Call Cousin Lynder Lou at The White Trash Café/Laughing Corpse Productions 615-383-0109

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